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4:00 PM: Caught a mouse in the back garden.
He didn’t want to tour the world and become dead famous. He
claimed he was quite happy living in an old boot in the garden
shed. It was only when I threatened to eat him that he realized
he did want to be famous. We started training with a daring
stunt in which he puts his head in a lion’s mouth. As there were
no lions around I let him use my mouth. This was probably a bad
idea. I got so excited about the stunt going well that I
accidentally bit his head off. No great loss. He was so nervous
he would have been a rotten juggler. Decided to become famous at
something other than mouse training – mice are far too
ungrateful.
10:20 PM: Tipped the contents of my
litter tray all over the kitchen floor as a gentle hint to
Trousers.
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