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I went to see Lucky today. Took the long
route avoiding the Lane for I feel attached to my ears and have
no desire to lose them. Lucky’s tail was all bandaged up! He
told me that he got so angry at the parrot’s taunts that he put
my advice into action. He crept up and knocked her perch over as
planned. But, when he tried to grab her, she jumped on his back
and tore lumps off his tail. Poor Lucky had to go to the vet to
get an anti-parrot-disease injection. Now Polly squawks,
“Arrrrr, me hearties, who’s a pretty stupid little pussy?”
Met Snowball on the way home. She wants me to
win her heart by challenging Killer to a duel. Really, how
barbaric. What century does she live in? Modern etiquette
dictates that the way to woo a lady-cat is to present her with a
love token such as a decapitated mouse or a comatose robin.
The contents of my tray still litter the
kitchen floor. Trails of gooey white footprints cover the
carpets. Come back Skirt, all is forgiven.
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